


How can you miss someone you've never met?

by tdcdylan



Category: The Maze Runner Series - James Dashner
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Comforting Thomas, Fluff, Hurt Newt (Maze Runner), M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Short One Shot, Song Lyrics, newt needs a hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-16
Updated: 2021-03-16
Packaged: 2021-03-25 04:47:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,476
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30083673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tdcdylan/pseuds/tdcdylan
Summary: It’s been a while since he had needed some thinking, but every life has ups and downs, and today was a down day. Or actually, it was a down week.
Relationships: Newt/Thomas (Maze Runner)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 14





	How can you miss someone you've never met?

**Author's Note:**

> This is basically for all my fellow overthinking introverts, enjoy!

How can you miss someone you’ve never met?

Since Newt was 10 years old, he’d wanted a house with a balcony. Or an apartment with a balcony. Or whatever. Just a place with some space outside so he could look at the stars. As a small kid he loved to be outside in the middle of the night, whole world quiet and a sky full of stars.   
At his parents house, they’d had this small flat roof connected to Newts bedroom, ideal for sneaking onto in the middle of the night. He would sit there for hours straight, just stargazing and wondering about life. 

A good second place hold the memories he has of the times he spent in the back of his parents car, which felt like it was 1 am rather than only 8 pm but it was already dark. Moon following the car, and a hazy shade of light from the lanterns outside. As a fairly introverted kid, the silence around him gave him consolation. If the world could choose to be quiet, why couldn’t he? 

After uni he’d found himself a small one bedroom apartment, balcony included. He had surrounded himself with a steady group of friends, who accepted him like he was. Friendly, always the one they could go to for advice or a good conversation, straight forward, but also kind of closed off. He liked everyone to think he was doing just fine. Even if he wasn’t. 

He had always liked to keep personal things for himself. They were personal, right? Why would he bother anyone with something they couldn’t fix for him anyways? But right now, fresh out of uni, he wished he could just open up to someone. 

Of course, he had Minho, Alby, Frypan and Ben, but sometimes he felt like he wasn’t anyone’s best friend. They functioned great as a group, but in the end, there had always been duos, and he was the third wheel. And with that came that they were now all starting their new lives. Figuring out adulthood in the big world. Hell, he barely even saw them anymore.   
In other words, he just wished that there was someone out there, just for him. Someone that could be his favorite person and vice versa. 

The older he became the less consolation he got from the nights alone in the dark. It gave him space to clear his mind, but also to start thinking, or more likely, overthinking. And that’s when the darkness of the night was not comforting him anymore, but started drowning him. 

It’s not like he was depressed or anything. He’d always had days or weeks where he just couldn’t get out of his head. He was an analytical, thoughtful person, but on the downside, that made him overthink everything. Small things, like how he’d reacted in conversations at work, but also the bigger things, for example life after uni, and how he would keep himself sane in this new stage of life. He would like someone he could share his thought with, without having to be embarrassed about it. 

Because these days, Newt found himself out on his small balcony every other evening, watching over the silent world at the most ungodly hours, lost in thought. And sometimes he would feel so alone that he could feel the darkness surround him, wash over his body like an ocean, making him loose control. 

Luckily, he could always shake himself out of it, but the empty feeling still remained. He would drag himself to his bed afterwards, which fortunately stood in the same room, and flop down onto it, waiting for sleep to catch up with him, making him forget the emotions that he only allowed himself to exist at the balcony. 

—

_How can you miss someone you've never met? ‘Cause I need you now but I don't know you yet.  
But can you find me soon because I'm in my head? Yeah, I need you now but I don't know you yet._

— 

It’s been a while since he had needed some thinking, but every life has ups and downs, and today was a down day. Or actually, it was a down week. He had barely time for himself this week, being overrun with a heavy workload, and he just wanted to clear his head. Have some time for himself to sort stuff out. So that’s how he ended up on the balcony, after what felt like months. 

His brown eyes followed a lonesome man walking his dog and although the moon was only half full, he could still see clearly. Maybe he had gotten used to this? The nightsky was clear, stars distinct. The air was cool on his skin, but not annoyingly cold. He ruffled his slightly disheveled hair, messed up from the short nap he’d taken, and kept staring into space. 

God, he should have done this earlier. He felt his mind unwind, insecurity washing over him, tipping him over the edge he had walked on all week long. His vision started to blur, but that’s when two strong arms wrapped around him from behind and he heard a soft whisper in his ear.

‘Hey, you.’

God, he was so fucking thankful for this boy. 

Newt slowly turned around in the pair of arms, hiding his face in the crook of Thomas’ neck, his own hands clutching his boyfriends shirt like a lifeline.   
They stood like that for a while, huddled up together on the balcony, until Newt felt himself shiver. 

Thomas, observant as always, slowly moved back a little, distancing himself from Newt to peek at his face.   
‘You don’t have to talk about it, but I’m here if you want to.’ He said, one hand still fondling with his hair.

‘It’s okay, Tommy, I just had a long week and my mind wouldn’t shut up, I’m sorry for waking you up’. Newt said quietly, observing his boyfriends collarbones so he didn’t have to look him in the eyes just yet. 

‘Hey, look at me. Please don’t say that, I’m glad I woke up, although I am a little tired and I kinda need to pee.’ Thomas said sheepishly. Newt chuckled fondly at him. ‘You go pee, it’s not like I’m going anywhere.’

In the meantime, Newt buried himself under the blankets. The room was dark, apart from a strip of light coming from the hallway, where Thomas had put on the light so he wouldn’t knock anything over. When he heard the footsteps return and felt the bed dent, he turned on his side, facing Thomas. 

‘Sometimes I think there’s something wrong with my brain, Tommy. It’s like it won’t shut up and I can’t make it stop until it has washed over me and leaves me feeling blurred.’ Newt mumbled while watching him get under the covers. ‘I wish my mind would just stop thinking and I could just stare into the dark without feeling empty.’

‘I know right,’ came the answer from the brown haired boy next him, ‘It’s like rambling to yourself without begin able to stop it.’ 

‘Right?!’

‘But you know you can always talk about work or something to me right? Because I sometimes feel like you build a wall around yourself whenever you feel down, and I wish you didn’t.’ Thomas gave him a pervasive look and Newt felt himself blush under it. Thomas could see right through him. 

_Of course he knew._

‘You’re not a burden to me or to anyone, Newt,’ Thomas continued sleepily, reaching out to him under the covers. ‘You are allowed to take up space and go to someone for advise or a conversation. You don’t always have to be the one people can go to, you can be both of them.’ 

And this was the exact reason why Newt had fallen in love with the boy in front of him. He fully accepted him as he was. Let him be, but also was there for him. 

‘I just—, I just don’t want to bother anyone with my problems, I suppose. They’re not that important anyways.’   
Newt turned on his back, Thomas’ hand falling away from him. He knew what he was doing right now, ignoring his feelings, pushing them away, because that was easier than dealing with them. When there came no reaction, he thought for a split second that Thomas had fallen asleep, but when he turned his head, he saw him look at him with a frown on his usually lit up face. 

‘Newt. Your problems matter, okay? And so do you.’

‘Thanks, Tommy.’ He responded softly, voice a little unstable. 

‘Will you come here now?’ 

Newt rolled over, pressing his face into Thomas’ shirt, entangling their legs. He felt Thomas fall asleep against him, his own eyes falling shut as well. 

_What did he do to deserve this beautiful human being?_

**Author's Note:**

> This was based on the song IDK You Yet by Alexander 23, go check it out because it's very fitting imo! And also, hit me up in the comments with your thoughts! :)


End file.
